i write a nasty letter to crispy crisp

while you are in englund i thought mebbe you can let me use the state helicopter to tool around in. i weigh considerable less than you but i can always take some lead bars to make up the difference. i promise to use it in a wasteful manner just like you do. i realize the state had no extra money and had to delay/cancel the homestead rebates but that never stopped you. i’ll also need the the goobernor’s SUV limo and and the security detail to go along with it. this way yur office can continue to waste the taxpayers’ money while you are away on bidniss. looks like yur lucky sweater warnt so lucky after all. the cowboys lost. of course i gloat.

HOT DAM! you got free tickets to go to pro football games in the VIP seats. i read you got free transportation also. you got free but it cost the taxpayers a million bucks. not a good deal for the tax payers. mebbe next year you can ask yur friend the owner of the cowboys to get me free tickets and transportation to see the cowboys in VIP seats. just because.

oh! wait a minnit, i is a taxpayer. i has to sacrifice and do without. do you actually think you have any chance to win the white house. jeb got that all sewed up. hiz dad was the chief of the CIA and assassinated JFK. then hiz pap became the preisident. hiz pap is so powerful he got hiz imbecile son elected to the white house. do you think he will let a two bit hoodlum like yurself get in the way of jeb’s job?

i think not. keep doing “silly” things. i beileve that “silly” is a secret code word your gang uses to signify something else. that something else is stupid. really, think about it. you didnt think that anyone wouldnt notice that you spent one million dollars on security to see “free” football? all the while the state has no money for property tax relief? i take home $2400 per month. my property tax bill is $2200 per quarter. that means that just about one month’s take home wages PER QUARTER(!) go to the town and county. and you get “free” football.

FART! it is costing me one million dollars. when am i ever going to get the customary and usual $695 tax rebate? right before you decide to run for president as some sort of bribe to vote for you? nope, let me use the state helicopter while you is in englund, dude! i can waste the tax payers’ money than you ever can. just give me a chance. i’ll make you proud of me.

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